Slurp Voraciously.
It is essential that you slurp your noodles in Japan.
It’s rude if you don’t.
You have to make more noise than the salary man sitting to your left and the high school hip hop kid to your right. The chef will be watching you and he’ll be horribly offended if he can’t hear you enjoying his noodles at fighter jet level decibels. His staff will be on call to sloppily pour water in your glass and spill ice cubes and water in your lap if you dare enjoy those noodles quietly. That’s selfish here.
Eating noodles is a social auditory experience. It’s a finely tuned symphony of lips, tongues and wanton gluttony.
The louder you go, the more politely you are received. And when you come to something that’s not a noodle, like a scrap of pork or a hard boiled egg, you better smack your lips something fierce. Your every move is being carefully monitored. You are being tested. You will be judged as either ‘ignorant foreigner swine’ or ‘foreigner who is trying their damnedest to be complimentary.’ Your future dining experience at this establishment depends on this vital first impression.
Japan is a very nuanced and sophisticated culture that makes it hard for non-islanders to assimilate. But when it comes to noodles and ramen, the math is simple:
The more noise you make, the more beloved you will become.
Slurp voraciously.
